The species of Gentleman is classified endangered nowadays. With the evolvement of mankind sniffing out potential returns before moving a gracious limb, not many care about modern chivalry these days.
The expected relationship of Effort and Reward has become joint hip to hip. A simple act of sending our girlfriends home is gradually losing its ground. “What is it in for me?” Especially when you are staying at the other end of the island (referencing 716.1 km² land mass of Singapore). You lose time, money and much needed rest. You both know without a sense of doubt that she is independent enough to go home on her own. So why bother?
Here are five reasons why you should.
1. It is a mark of maturity
In contrast to the rarity of gentlemen in a self-seeking society, what we have in abundant is men who find glory in their dating games. Men, leave the games to the boys. Say goodbye to aimless, short-term dating. Be serious in your relationship. Start showing your commitment by sending your girlfriend home. Pair your words with actions. She will be moved.
2. You are willing to put in effort for this relationship
Especially when you take at least an hour to travel home from where she stays. It shows that you are committed, even at the expense of your own time and comfort. Time is precious, and by sending her home, you are saying to her “You are more precious than my time”. If she is worth it, do it.
3. You want to ensure the safety of your girlfriend
Regardless of how safe the neighbourhood is, all you need is one rotten egg. If your girlfriend is precious enough to you, you will want to ensure that she reaches her doorstep safely. Her safety is more important than anything else. She will appreciate your intentions, and recognise your love for her.
4. You want to spend more time with her
When I was courting my girlfriend – even pass the stage of euphoria – time spent with her was never enough. By sending her home, I gained a good hour more with her. Couples should be spending a healthy amount of time together, so that you can grow and groom the budding love. Take a nice leisurely walk, spend quality time in conversations at park benches around her place. Some years down, these simple acts could be the ones you remember, rather than those spent in fancy restaurants or cinemas.
5. You end each date on a loving note
If your date did not turn out well, or if an argument had arise, use this time to cool down and talk things out. Never end a date with anger or unhappiness. There were times where I had huge arguments with my girlfriend and we returned home with the argument hanging over our heads, sometimes spiralling a new life of its own and losing sleep. Speak everything in love, be quick to listen and slow to speak – disagreements will then serve to build a stronger relationship. No one promises that love will be all blooming sweetness without any thorns, but we can always choose to cultivate and prune our love for it to bear lasting fruits.
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While the world is discarding gentlemen to the ‘irrelevant’ and “based on conditions” yard, need I suggest that you do not have to follow the crowd. You are an individual. The love between you and your girlfriend is solely for both of you to build and nurture.
Be a man of your own. Love like a man.